The Giant Mechanical Man

A Movie about Postmodernism, Struggle & the Power of being Genuine

I usually experience the abrasive reality of postmodern life during the Subway’s rush hour.

      You see, at my previous employment, the commute from my house to the Upper East Side was utter agony. I’m the official “Priestess of the Non-Morning People Population,” (that’s a mouthful, I know) but I would attempt to unglue my body from the bed anyways.

       When I boarded the overcrowded train, my lethargic brain had difficult time processing information. I couldn’t read. I couldn’t mumble Tehillim. All I could do was slink my body against the train’s door and examine my fellow commuters. Who are these people? As a writer, I yearn to know another’s story. Why is he dressed like that? What country is she from? How did that couple meet? What is he reading on his iPad? I will never know their story. They will also never know mine.

A Study in Contrasts

Photo via The Sartorialist

       A week has passed since Purim and I’m still contemplating it. I was going to dress like a gypsy. I wished to embody that free-spirited woman; fresh from the fight and raw with restlessness. I envisioned my dark hair gloriously unrestrained, bangles creating music with every moment, a folkloric patterned skirt sweeping the floor. Yet, waking up on Purim morning, I rubbed my sleepy eyes and mumbled “nah—not in the mood.”

      What to do? What to do? I initiated an invasion of my mother’s vintage-laden closet. There was a psychedelic top from the 70s, a few flannel shirts from the 90s, and wait a minute—what’s this? I excitedly eyed a hat perched on my mother’s shelf.

It was a round straw hat with a dainty veil attached. Made in England! Very Duchess Catherine. Very “Breakfast at Tiffany’s.”

I swooned at the hat’s effeminate beauty. All I needed was a quintessentially British suit and I would be all set.

“Ma, do you have a tailored, ladylike suit? I need it for my costume.”

“No, I don’t” she said perusing her closet.  

“Hey! What about this one?”  She pointed at a mustard-yellow power suit with shoulder pads the size of my face.

This monstrosity? I balked. If I were to wear this outfit, then I would look like the hypothetical love child of Princess Diana and Superman.

Is Everyone on Facebook Having Fun Except Me?

        Have you seen yesterday’s article dubbed “We Need to Quit Telling Lies on Facebook” by Sarah Emily Tuttle-Singer (a guest contributor on Kveller.com)? Sarah’s article is hilarious and saturated with truth. She coaxes herself, and other parents, to paint a more realistic portrait of their life on social media:  

“My life on Facebook is an airbrushed and instagrammed image of my real life,” Sarah claims. “I edit the suckage because I want people to think I have my act together. I give everything a hipstacular filter to make the drudgery look interesting. Most of the time, I think I’m a decent mom, and I think I’m giving my children a pretty good life. But I also think I’d be a better mom if I stopped pretending, and making friends on Facebook feel like they have to pretend as well.”

        Since this blog is geared towards (mostly) 20-something singles, here’s a post that carries the same theme and relates it to our age-group. It may come across as a bit of a downer—but it ends with a single line that brings our Internet-absorbed, Twitter-lovin’, Facebook-fueled selves back to earth; a place where we must take off our synthetic masks in order to breathe.

St-EYE-lista;

Editor’s Edition

 

Photo via www.citizencouture.com
 

Welcome back to our bi-monthly column: The “St-EYE-lista”! This column features an individual whose personal style captured our EYE and whose fashion sense can be reinterpreted for the modest dresser. From talk-show hosts to socialites and from Creative Directors to bloggers, Wear Your Invisible Crown prides itself on revealing the kaleidoscopic gamut of fashion ingénues and icons. From January until March we will specifically focus on style icons who are (or once were) Editors of prominent fashion publications. We look forward to presenting our audience with an array of style and information regarding our featured Editors. Enjoy this special one!

 

 

       There are certain runway clothing that will make your face contort into a “who-on-G-d’s-green-earth-would-wear that?” kind of expression. They just will.

       Alexander McQueen can send a gown down the runway that will make your eyes voice shock and your nose scrunch in disapproval. Well, while you’re sitting in the Front Row and clutching your poor heart, there is someone out there whose eyes are expressing rapture and whose lips are positively dancing.

“Bellisma!” she exclaims, clapping her jewelry laden hands together.   

That someone is Editor-in-Chief of Vogue Japan, Anna Dello Russo.

       Described as a “Fashion Maniac” by legendary photographer Helmut Newton, Anna Dello Russo approaches style with the sheer enthusiasm of a 5-year old girl playing dress-up. Her frocks, skirts, and shoes (she has 4,000 of those!) are ridiculously ostentatious. Exaggerated silhouettes that remind one of a vulture, hats shaped like eggs, fiercely colored shoes—this woman owns it all.

In addition, if the name "Anna Dello Russo" rings a bell, there’s a chance you heard it this past Fall. In October 2012, Anna designed a delightfully gaudy accessories collection for H & M.

We specifically chose to feature Anna Dello Russo prior to Purim, because perhaps HER everyday wear can potentially inspire YOUR costume. Who knows?

CAUTION: You’ll need just a bit of humor to appreciate this enamoring lady.

 

Mona Lisa Smile

A Movie of Female Empowerment

This past Saturday night, during a trip to Miami, my friend and I chose to stay in. (Yes—we’re prone to dullness at times). Our hotel *cough, cough* (a 1 star, mind you) barely offered 15 TV channels (7 of which were in Spanish and 1 in French). Oh, and did I mention that a remote control was non-existent?

We took turns to drag our lazy backsides off the bed and be the official “channel switcher.” Eventually we succumbed to a laptop and Netflix.

My friend and I opted to watch a film called Mona Lisa Smile starring Julia Roberts, Kirsten Dunst, and Julia Stiles. (My friend likes Julia Roberts and I like the “Mona Lisa.” Thus, it was a fairly easy way to compromise).

Mona Lisa Smile is about an Art History professor named Ms. Watson (played by Julia Roberts) who arrives at Wellesley College in 1953. This professor notices how the all-female student body analyzes art. They utilize rigid textbook methodology. The way they approach their personal lives is not that different either. These young women are expected to marry young and become homemakers extraordinaire. Once married, they are to vacuum, iron, and cook perfectly—with lusciously lined lips and coiffed curls of course.

 

         What makes Ms. Watson indignant is seeing how her students’ sole drive is to marry well and embody the stereotypical 50’s housewife. She watches how her otherwise intelligent students shrug off their talents in favor of a purely domestic lifestyle.

         Predictably, Ms. Watson’s feministic philosophies are quickly upended by fierce opposition (from both teachers and students). It was the ‘50s after all. In spite of this, Ms. Watson continues to bulldoze over “a woman’s boundaries” by telling her students that they have a choice: They do NOT have to belittle their ambitions because of marriage. They can do both—career and family.

         This subject is obviously exhaustive and hackneyed: “Women and Work,” “Women and Family,” “Women and Societal Expectations.” We’ve seen and heard and read it all. Right?

Vogue December 2012

 

But four days later, and I'm still contemplating this movie. The characters reminded me of my former classmates, my fellow Synagogue-goers, my neighbors, and of....yours truly.

It all began when my older brother was able to get greatly discounted tickets to this year’s “Disney on Ice” at Barclay’s Center. He gathered his little brood of boys and offered tickets to his nieces and nephews as well; it was a sweet Chanukah present for all the children. An extra pair of hands was needed to chaperone, so they gave the ever-dutiful Aunt (me!) a ticket as well.

To the outer world, I like to pretend I’m a trendy yuppie with a hopping social calendar. I meet the girls for drinks, then I attend some swanky East Side professional-networking event, and finally, I freshen up my lipstick to meet a dashing date.

Yeah right.

My reality is more “with the kids” than “with the band.” More “Dora the Explorer,” less 22 year-old exploring. Of course I love being with my nieces and nephews, but whenever I attend a Sesame Street Show at Madison Square Garden (3 times so far) or toddlers’ amusement park, I’m reminded of how “un-adultish” my existence truly is. When my friends are too occupied to meet me (which is usually the case), I’m left with no other alternative but to color, er, paint the town with a trio of 5-year olds. If it involves a stash of Care-Bear DVDs and Mott’s apple juice on a Saturday night, then so be it.

As far as this “Disney on Ice” situation? It was different than the usual “Oh-my-G-d, why-am-I-here?” sentiments that Uncle Moishe concerts brew in me. I haven’t seen a Disney film in years, but when Sebastian sang “Under the Sea” while doing Triple-Axels that evening, I felt very happy. You read that correctly. Happy.

Color Coding

Miroslava Duma in a Dior Coat

Our monthly column "COLOR CODING" is baaack baby! Click on the “Color Coding” label below this article to see our previous Color Coding posts (if you haven’t seen them already).

February’s color is FUCHSIA. Sure this color may be reminiscent of all those cheesy, jaunty hearts plastered in every store in honor of Valentine’s Day. But I assure you that is not why I chose this color for February. I care not for this holiday. Firstly I’m single, and secondly Saint Valentine has Christian roots (did the term Saint give it away?).

Diane Von Furstenberg Fall 2012

Valentine’s Shmalentine’s aside, I chose fuchsia because it’s a perfect bridge between winter and spring. Its jewel-like tone suggests winter depth, while its undeniable buoyancy alludes to sunnier months ahead. Simply stated, fuchsia works beautifully in all seasons, as it does on all complexions. This  color  is able to suffuse warmth into every skin tone...from ivory to ebony.

What I especially like about fuchsia is that it’s feminine without being overtly girly. Unlike a paler pink, fuchsia is more ballsy. This color possesses the “characteristics” of the woman I’d like to become. Fuchsia also made an appearance on Zac Posen's Spring 2013 runway. Check out this beauty!

Zac Posen Spring 2013

Here are a few ways to don this hue

 in the upcoming months: