“Ten Things We Did Better as Children”
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This girl is wearing her "Invisible (or not so invisible...heh-heh) Crown." Yay!
As mentioned in a previous post (October’s “Parshat Vayeira, Hurricane
Sandy, and Children”), I don’t believe it’s a mere coincidence that recent head-lining tragedies have centered around the murder of
children (Casey Anthony, Leiby Kletzky, the two children and the nanny in
Manhattan, the child that passed during the Colorado shooting, and now the
Connecticut massacre). As I forge my way into adulthood, I only realize now how
“cheated” I feel over my lost childhood. A child’s unadulterated optimism and
belief in humanity have not yet been overshadowed by adulthood’s cynicism,
embitterment, and blasé attitude towards (almost) everything.
Many children have a sheer confidence towards life, a “fall down
to rise again” doctrine, and a fascination with the smallest trinkets and bugs
and flowers. The horrific tragedies involving children not only remind us of how
incredibly fragile they are, but also
of life’s general fragility. Although I attached this link to October’s post
regarding “Children,” I’m not sure if actually worked. I don’t like to take
chances again, so I re-typed “Ten Things We Did Better as Children” from
www.ThoughtCatalog.com This article is by Chelsea Fagan. It’s worth a read!
“Ten Things We Did Better as Children”
1. Make Friends:
While the fact that we are constantly in proximity with
people our own age and have nothing better to do than go out and play with
sticks for a few hours no doubt helps in our ability to make friends, there is
an openness in childhood that allows us to embrace people without a weird layer
of judgment and hesitation. There doesn’t come a moment in kindergarten where
you see someone across the classroom and you’re like, “Oh, eww, that girl needs
to stop looking at me with those bitchy eyes. What is she wearing? A skirt?
Pfft. Okay, grandma.” We’re just like, “Hey, you have a Hello Kitty lunchbox. I
like Hello Kitty. Let’s be best friends until the end of time,” and we are.
It’s perfect.
2. Forgive
people.
There is a strange tendency we develop as we get older (except,
I imagine, in old age when you literally stop giving a darn about anything that
doesn’t absolutely matter) to hold onto things long past their expiration date.
There are certain slights that we shouldn’t go back on for our own mental
health/emotional safety, but let’s be honest — most things don’t fall into that
category. When you’re young, though, you basically just punch each other in the
face and then you’ve immediately forgotten what you were upset about. Were that
we could have such sage calm when it comes to our significant others. “You
forgot to take out the trash again!!??!?!?! This is unforgivable!!” Come on,
it’s pretty forgivable.
3. Try new
things.
It’s as though life could be divided into two distinct
categories: the time when you’re willing to experiment with unknown but
potentially awesome things, and the time you’ve decided that everything
unfamiliar should be side-eyed into oblivion. It perhaps comes at the moment
when someone makes you try brussel sprouts for the first time and your child
self feels so profoundly betrayed: “What is this!?! What cruel God would make a
food grow from the earth that literally tastes like feet??!” From that moment
on, we are destined to hesitate considerably before we embark on any new
adventures.
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4. Be content
with what we have.
There is such a sweet innocence for our ability, when
young, to be completely content with what is available to us. We have no real
concept of envy or
inferiority yet, only a sort of general excitement about being alive and
getting to play. You don’t know how much money anyone has, or where they live,
or if they are better-looking than you. There is just a pleasure in what is
available, in making the most of what you have. If only we could feel this way
when one of our friends invites us over to their new apartment that is
beautifully furnished, in the perfect location, and filled with
impressive-looking knick knacks from various world travels.
5. Admit we are
wrong.
Why is it often so difficult to admit — to others and,
more importantly, to ourselves — when we are in the wrong about something?
Apologies should not be easier to deliver with insincere qualifiers like, “I’m
sorry you felt that way,” but they so are. There is just something so grating,
so offensive to our pride, to admit that we made a mistake and owe someone else
a sincere apology. When we’re kids, though, there is a .45 second duration to
any feeling of righteous indignation, and we’re fully aware that getting over
ourselves and saying we’re sorry when we should is the key to happiness,
friends, and potential lollipops after dinner. Maybe we should all start giving
out lollipops for thoughtful, honest apologies?
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He's also wearing his...you guessed it!
6. Enjoy simple
things.
Have you ever played with a stick? I mean really
played with it? Have you ever seen all the amazing things sticks can do and
become with your imagination? Have you heard the dulcet tones they produce when
run along a picket fence? Are you on my stick level? No? Then you have some
five-year-olds you need to chill with stat, because they are about to blow your
uptight mind, brah.
7. Come up with
something to do.
You leave a kid alone in a room for a few minutes and
they will literally just start talking to themselves and pretending that they
are flying or something. They don’t care. They will take that cardboard box and
travel to the moon to have tea with their family of teddy bears. What do you do
when you’re alone in your room? If we’re being honest, probably complain on the
internet about how bored you are and dismiss the fact that you are literally constantly
surrounded by potential sweet things that you could be doing. No one cares
if you look crazy, just start talking to yourself and making up an awesome
alternate universe to hang out with. It’ll be great.
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8. Let go.
While there are definitely things that can upset you as a
kid — moving to a new
school/town comes to mind — we are so much more elastic when it comes to
rebounding from the setbacks. Sure, you’re upset for a while and there are
definitely things you miss, but you’re going to focus on the positives and
enjoy yourself as much as possible, because you understand how little being
upset about things actually gets you. Besides, there are wayyyy too many sticks
to play with in your new neighborhood to worry about the past.
9. Find the
humor in things.
If you can pee your pants in front of your entire class
and still go out that night and enjoy your “let’s make you feel better” dinner
at Chuck E Cheese’s, I think you have found the secret to a higher plane of
existence.
10. Be
comfortable in our own skin.
I often look at pictures of myself when young and am
struck by how purely happy I look, how confident and sure I feel, all while
wearing these heinous sweaters my grandmother would make me wear with these
weird puff-balls of fabric all over them. I look like a hairball Nyan Cat
coughed up, and yet, I am just so chill I couldn’t be bothered with what anyone
thought. I didn’t know what it meant to look silly, or for people to judge me,
and I was happy to have my picture taken. If only I could get back to that
time, perhaps I wouldn’t spend the morning after parties paralyzed in fear that
my unphotogenic self would be plastered all over Facebook and I wouldn’t be
able to detag the particularly egregious shots with the necessary speed. We
could all stand to be that little kid in the ugly sweater again, not giving a
damn if anyone thinks we’re pretty.
As I mentioned in October's post:
"Children are the dancing flicker of our eyes and the most
wholesome joy of our hearts. Even if you’re not a “kids person” per say, you
still realize the inimitable role they share in your life. Children won’t
necessarily educate us on the theory of relativity, Shakespeare’s Hamlet, or why we should opt for a pear instead of Cheese Curls (it’s kind of our job to do that), but they do
educate us on how to live."
WE WOULD LIKE TO DEDICATE THE SONG "CHILDREN" BY ESCALA TO THOSE PRECIOUS LITTLE ONES WHO PERISHED IN LAST WEEK'S TRAGEDY. ALTHOUGH WE DEEPLY MOURN THEIR PASSING, WE ALSO CELEBRATE THE JOYOUS MOMENTS THAT THEY'VE EXPERIENCED IN THEIR LIVES:
Its great! Really a good article!♥Sima.
ReplyDeleteThanks Sima!
ReplyDeleteVery touching...
ReplyDeleteThank you! :)
ReplyDeleteWow this post is beyond fabulous! I'm so happy I met you recently because now I can envision you when I read these posts. Why have I not been following your posts?? I am doing so now!
ReplyDeletexo
Sharon
PS you need to add a way to follow your blog here, like google friend connect, or email subscription or on facebook or twitter. You should have follow buttons and a FB page and post these blogs on them to get more readers. How will we know when you have a new post??
ReplyDeletexo
Sharon
Ten Things We Did Better as Children is filled with profound insights.
ReplyDeleteI love it!
It also validates my suspicions that forgiving others becomes harder with age.
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ReplyDeleteThanks you Mr. Cohen. Glad you enjoyed!
ReplyDelete